Weevil Wedding
by PhoenixFuture
Summary: A short story, the sequel to 'First Kiss', about the continued romance of Owen Harper and Janet the Weevil.


**Weevil Wedding**

**(Sequel to 'First Kiss')**

Diary of Ianto Jones:

'It's now two weeks and one day since the Owen-Weevil kiss and I still can't look at him in the eye without laughing. Owen's been much nicer since the 'incident' as he called it when he tells Jack to shut up about it. To be honest I don't think Owen's completely over it yet. He keeps spending his nights alone at the Hub, whenever Jack's not there. And he's not there, because he's on dates with me. Oh yeah! Official dates! Go me!'

***

Gwen was the first to leave. She ran out of the Hub at half past eight, screaming at the circular metal door, complaining it rolled away too slowly. She said she was meeting Rhys at some fancy Indian restaurant. Next, Ianto and Jack left together to go some other restaurant in Cardiff Bay. Tosh was the last to leave, finally locking her computer account, before grabbing her handbag and clomping out in leather boots.

Owen Harper didn't leave the Hub that night. As soon as the circular door had rolled shut and the iron bars had closed in front of it he waited as usual in case Tosh or one of the others had forgotten something. He stared curiously at Tosh's computer screen. Why did she always lock her account? he wondered. No one else did. And she never used to. When Owen had asked her about it she had gone all quiet just saying 'she was working on something'.

He glanced at his watch. It was 10:21pm. That was fine. He would make sure he was hidden at midnight just in case Jack brought Ianto back here like the other night. But to be honest, Owen didn't think that Jack and Ianto would notice him even if he was in plain view. They didn't really have their eyes open often, and even if they did they probably wouldn't be able to see past each other's face...

So now the Hub was as silent as it could be with the everlasting whir of the water tower and the many computers, the dripping of water from the walls and in the channels in the floor and the occasional squawk from the pet pterodactyl. Owen had one final look around before heading off to the Vaults. He was going to see Janet. The Weevil.

As Owen dragged the Vault door along the floor, he heard Janet move to the front of her cage. He didn't know why but he really enjoyed his nights with her. They didn't always kiss but he would just sit in the cage and look at her and she would look back. Since their first kiss, Owen started to like the feeling of losing control of his body.

Tonight, Owen opened and left the cage door and he slipped inside. He sat crossed legged on the damp, cold floor. Janet copied him and pulled Owen's hand into her lap. She held too tightly and cut his skin, but he didn't notice. He saw himself reflected in her eyes.

The next day brought no surprises for Owen. He sat on the autopsy table, just like yesterday, being interrogated by Tosh.

"So have you noticed any differences in the way you think or feel?"

"Have you had any physical changes?"

"Have you met any suspicious people recently?"

Always the same questions. And always the same answers.

"No."

"Nope."

"That would be a no-no."

"Tosh when are you going to give this up?" Owen moaned.

"When I have an answer. You would not just kiss a Weevil."

"How do you know what I'd do?"

"Because... I've been one of your best friends for four years and because..." Tosh turned away from him as she said this.

"Because?" said Owen.

Turning back to him Tosh answered, "Because I care about you a lot Owen."

"Well, I wouldn't waste your time. I'm already dead. And if it'll make you stop this, yes, I like to kiss Weevils, all kinds of aliens in fact. Yep, as soon as they wake up from their autopsy, they get a nice little kiss from Owen. The good doctor, that's me."

"Owen, this is serious. You should be taking it seriously. And you should answer my questions seriously."

"Why? You answer mine first." Owen grinned mischievously at Tosh. "Why do you suddenly lock your computer all the time you're not within a metres distance of it?"

"I'm not sure you want to know that."

"Yep, I definitely do." He grinned still.

Tosh lowered her voice. "I lock my computer every night in your favour. I keep check over all CCTV footage of the entire Hub 24-7 including your little visits to the Vaults every night. I've been taking that footage and locking it so you can only watch it on my account. So unless you want me to show it to everyone else, you better answer the questions and let me help you."

Owen's face was deathly pale. His smile had completely gone.

"Fine, I'll let you 'help' me. But have you ever considered that maybe I don't need your help and that I like Janet?" Owen retaliated. "You got your fun with Mary."

"That was different."

"How was it?" Owen's eyes were like daggers.

"I _loved_ her." Tosh laughed. "Don't tell me you're in love with a Weevil, are you?"

"Maybe I am."

Tosh stopped laughing. She looked at Owen deadly serious. He wasn't any signs of having a 'joke'.

"Say you're lying." She pleaded. She felt like she was being torn apart. Owen was in love with someone else. And that someone was a _Weevil_.

It was now early evening. Tosh didn't know what to do. This was getting out of hand. Earlier that day the team had got reports from UNIT of fallen alien tech causing dangerously high radiation levels. As Jack ordered the team to the SUV Owen walked up to him silently then whispered in his ear. As Gwen, Ianto and Tosh followed Jack out, Owen headed to the Vaults.

Four members of the team sat in the black Torchwood SUV. Tosh pulled the blue computer screens down onto her lap and her eyes followed the undulating line that showed the radiation levels of their destination. She couldn't stop thinking about Owen.

"What did he actually say to you Jack?"

"Tosh, you really should leave him alone, he has died remember."

"Yes, I know, Jack. I care about him."

"All he said was he wanted some time alone to think," Jack finally answered. "It's not like we need him on this case, is it?"

"He won't be alone though," Tosh muttered to herself.

"What was that, Tosh?" Jack called back from the driver's seat.

"Er... The radiation spikes. They're getting bigger, we should hurry."

On Tosh's screen were no radiation spikes but images of Owen kissing a Weevil. Filled with jealousy, Tosh saved them on to her email attachments, before entering 'Jack' into the 'To' bar. Her curser hovered over 'send'.

"Come on. Toshiko, out," Jack ordered.

Tosh looked up to see Jack hovering over her, locked her computer and clambered out into a very muddy field. Her high-heeled boots sank into the ground. She sighed as Jack wrapped his arm around her and led her to the UNIT tent.

As they drove back the sky over Cardiff Bay was a dusky orange, with streaks of red disappearing over the horizon.

Now back at the Hub, Tosh sat quietly at her desk, watching. Owen was back to his usual self, but... happier. He was talking animatedly to Gwen and Jack, while he thanked Ianto for his coffee! Ianto looked pleasantly surprised as he walked to Jack's side. Tosh couldn't help thinking that something was wrong. In all her years that she had known and loved Owen she had never seen him like this. Even on the best days where they would sit and laugh over a coffee he wouldn't have that spring in his step like Jack. It just wasn't him. But now he bounded around the Hub like an excited puppy.

While Gwen and Owen chased each other round and round the autopsy table, Jack and Ianto looked worried. Quietly, Jack walked over to Tosh.

"I want you to send me that footage now, please." He whispered in her ear, before climbing the stairs to his office. Ianto was the next to approach Tosh.

"He does know, by the way. Though, you've been making it very hard for him to see that CCTV film. Is that he wanted?"

Tosh nodded silently. "I was only trying to help him."

"He knows."

Up on the balcony, Jack shouted, "Ianto, Toshiko, my office now."

At the autopsy table, Gwen clamped her arms around Owen shouting, "Gotcha!" Owen had gone completely still; his eyes were fixed on Jack's office door which closed behind Tosh.

"What have you got, Tosh?" Jack asked. Ianto and Tosh were sitting opposite him in his office, the door firmly locked behind them.

"Well, I've been doing some research into how the Weevil gets humans to maybe think that it is another human wearing a very good prosthetic mask, and how up to the last second before being killed the human still has some doubt as to whether it is real. Of course some of this is the natural human instinct, for most people, to not believe that it is a real alien creature, but then some of this is controlled by the Weevil. It seems when Owen died he became much easier for the Weevils to control his thoughts. It would seem that Janet is missing someone, hence the strong infatuations that are occurring in Owen for her, and the fact that he goes and sits with her every night. That's all I got."

Tosh looked up at Jack.

"Yeah, that's pretty much the same as I got, but I got a way to stop it," Jack said, grinning at Tosh. He turned to Ianto. "But before that what did you get, my honeybunch?"

Ianto scowled at Jack as Toshiko stifled a giggle. He then continued looking down at his clipboard. He turned it round to face Jack and Tosh. On it was one sentence which he read out.

"Owen's actually in love with a Weevil."

A Weevil tranquilizer dart pierced the back of Owen's neck. Just as Gwen re-entered the room.

"What the hell are you doing, Jack?!"

"Come on, we need to show you something," Toshiko led Gwen to her computers. Gwen resisted, "But...Owen?"

"Gwen, look at the screen," Tosh insisted.

Gwen stopped staring in confusion at Jack and Ianto dragging Owen's unconscious body across the Hub floor, before finally lifting him onto the autopsy table. Gwen looked at Tosh's computer.

"Why are you showing me this again?" she asked.

"Look at the date," Ianto said, joining them by her side.

"What?! That can't be right. Owen did not snog a Weevil _yesterday_!"

"Yep, he did. And every day since their first," Jack added in.

"But then what are we going to do? We can't have him Weevil snogging every night," Gwen's eyes were still fixed to the screen.

"Well, Jack says he knows what to do," Tosh looked over to her boss, who was now grinning childishly.

"This is gonna be fun," he squealed. The others stared at him. "Right. Yes. Ianto with me."

Jack jumped down to the lower level of the Hub. He turned back, holding his hand out for Ianto; Gwen and Tosh smiled at each other. This didn't go unnoticed by Ianto, so he quickly withdrew his hand away from Jack's and walked, embarrassed, to the stairs. They walked together to the Vaults, Jack picking up a tranquilizer dart on their way.

They returned to the central Hub area with Janet, ten minutes later. Bit long for just sedating a Weevil. Gwen was feeling mischievous. "Took your time, didn't you two?"

"We got distracted," is all that Jack said, and when he thought Gwen wasn't looking he smiled at Ianto.

"By what exactly?" she continued.

"The leak down in the Vaults seems to be getting worse," Ianto said, quickly. Too quickly. Gwen smiled at Tosh, but then decided to leave it. Owen would wake soon.

"Right, everyone. When Owen wakes up, we need to get him to say he loves Janet, everyone push him as far as you can; it'll make him realise he's not actually in love with our resident Weevil, here." Janet thrashed in her chains, but Ianto held her back firmly. Sure enough, Owen woke just moments later. First he charged at Jack, shouting why the hell had he stabbed him. He felt his neck. It was there; a little hole where the dart had gone which would never heal.

Then he saw the Weevil. He immediately started walking towards her, to where Ianto was pulling on the chains.

"Where you going Owen? To your Weevil lover?" Jack called.

"Did you love it, Owen? Do you love Janet?" Gwen followed Jack's lead. Then Toshiko and Ianto continued shouting at Owen. Just as he was approaching Janet, he suddenly turned round to face them and seemed to explode.

"YES! I LOVE JANET! ME. I. LOVE. HER. JANET. WEEVIL."

Jack looked pleased with himself. "Say it again, Owen."

Owen's voice was now small and confused. "I love Janet the Weevil."

"It's working. We need something to really tip him over the edge," Jack whispered to his teammates.

"You wanna marry Janet, Owen? You wanna Weevil wedding, do you, Owen?" Gwen shouted.

Owen stayed silent. "It's worked," Jack announced. "Now someone needs to kiss him."

The team looked at their leader in shock.

"What you daydream about in your free time is fine, just don't try and make it come true, with me at least," Gwen said, glancing over to Ianto.

"No, seriously, it's the only way we can get him out of this shell-shock," Jack continued. Tosh was standing quietly in the corner.

"Gwen?"

"Jack! No way, I have a boyfriend!"

"Ianto?"

Ianto looked like he was having a heart attack.

"Definitely no. And anyway I'm holding the Weevil."

Jack would ask Toshiko, but from the way she stood silently in the corner made him think she would say no straight away.

"I'll do it then," Jack said, grinning. Across the room, Ianto looked annoyed. "Or not."

"I'll do it." Tosh moved next to Gwen. "Um... I mean if no one else will..."

"Er, yeah, go on then Tosh," Jack encouraged.

Tosh slowly walked to where Owen was standing, staring at the floor and swaying gently forward and back. She was all too conscious of the eyes staring at her. Still as long as they thought she was only doing this to save Owen then everything would be fine...

As Toshiko approached him, Owen stared at her. Toshiko tried not to think of what he would say afterwards, as she stood on her tip-toes to reach Owen's lips. As soon as she kissed him, she knew it had worked but she found it hard to pull away. Eventually, she did.

"What the hell were you doing, Tosh?!" Was the first thing that Owen said.

"It's good to have you back," Tosh replied, before pressing her lips against his again.

Everyone was staring at them now. Tosh backed away from Owen and went to her desk area. She felt Gwen's shocked stare still following her.

"Bloody hell," Owen stated before his eyes slid closed, and he fell backwards, landing on the Hub floor with a soft crash. Immediately, the Torchwood team sprung into action. Ianto dragged Janet back down to the Vaults. Jack and Gwen heaved the unconscious Owen onto the autopsy table for the second time that day and started checking him over. Toshiko checked that all his readings. They were normal.

"What the hell happened?!" Owen shouted as soon as he woke.

"Don't you remember?" Ianto asked. "Well, this morning in your daily interrogation by Tosh you said you loved Janet the Weevil. Then in the afternoon Tosh showed Jack all of the CCTV footage of all of your romantic nights with Janet. Then he worked out a way to get you back to your normal self. You shouted that you loved the Weevil a lot, but when Gwen asked if you wanted to marry it, you shut up. Tosh kissed you to get you out of the shell-shock... And then she kissed you again."

"Yeah, I remember that bit," Owen sat up on the table. "I'm gonna go watch me snogging a Weevil."

Ten minutes later, Owen sat at Tosh's desk with her standing behind him. On her screen was Owen walking towards the Weevil and then shouting how much he loved it.

"Bloody hell."

"You believe me now?" Tosh asked.

"Bloody hell," seemed to be all that Owen could manage at the moment. The screen was now showing Toshiko kissing him. Suddenly Owen's face lit up and he was smiling his old cocky smile. He turned to Tosh.

"You have to admit I'm one hell of a kisser."

Toshiko turned away so that he couldn't see her face. She smiled quietly to herself.

"Yes. I'm glad the Weevil enjoyed it."

At Tosh's desk, Owen leant back, putting hands on the back of his head.

"I'm back," he sighed.


End file.
